I Will Never Tell Them
by Nockise
Summary: "Hello, I am Kai Matic. I have not said one word in my life. Not one. Zero. Zilch. I'm like that kid from Touch, except less badass. Anyways, I've recently moved to South Park, and it sucks. The residents here are always getting into some major trouble, whether it may be world wars, or bringing forth darkness, these people can do some serious shit. Screw my life."


I said nothing as I walked with the principal to my new class.

I always said nothing. That's what I'm comfortable with and I would love to keep it that way. I'm not some special snowflake or think I'm cool, (well, I guess not saying a single word to anyone in my entire life is something) I'm just anti-social. I don't like talking to people, and I don't like getting involved in anything. So you can imagine my dismay when I learned of what South Park was capable of.

South Park. Does anyone know this place? No? Well, it's actually not the town in it, but from what I can understand is that there is a south, middle, and north park. I honestly have no idea what the hell the town is called, but the residents seem comfortable of calling it South Park. Maybe my parents messed up and that's actually the town name? Who gives a crap, all I know is that we moved because my parents though it was the best idea in the world. I will never in a million years take my parent's word that we had to move because of dad's job. I know they love torturing me, probably revenge for never talking to them. They tried to teach me sign language once, and I remember showing them the only sign language I was capable of. The glorious middle figure. Nowadays, I know the sign language for sex, asshole, and "I love you" in Japanese, but I barely use that one.

Anyways, now that you know a ton of shit about me, let's get back to the point. I am a confused child in an unfamiliar place and in an unfamiliar school with unfamiliar people. This is my first time moving, ok?

The principal practically shoved me into the classroom, and did not react to the pouty face I gave her as she walked away. I sighed as I turned around to face the horrible, horrible, faces of white trash, waiting for me to share information so they can use it to their advantage to come into my room at night and abduct me and bring me into their alien ship and dissect my human organs- wait. I'm going too far. This is why I don't talk to people.

"Class, this is our new student Kai Matic."

"Hi Kai." The class muttered respectfully. I could not simply ignore how bitchly a girl with a pink beret said it.

"He doesn't talk much because he thinks he's a hotshot, so don't kill him because of this on the first day."

My eyes widened in shock as I took a step back. What are these kids capable of!?

I begrudgingly made my way to my seat as the students went back to work. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw some students whispering presumably about me.

I sighed. I have made up my mind that I will not survive in this mountain town.

* * *

><p>"Hey, new kid!" someone exclaimed.<p>

I gripped the plastic tray so hard in my hands, I thought it was going to break. … and then I could sharpen the broken plastic into shanks. Yes. I have a lovely mind.

I almost robotically turned my head to see oh god it's that fatass. And some ginger kid waving his hand at me.

Nope. I instantly zoomed farther and farther away from their table. I found an empty table on the other side of the cafeteria instead.

Yup.

I plopped down onto a seat and put my tray down. I stared at the contents of my tray and poked at some meat.

"I know, it sucks. It used to be good when our other chef was around."

I yelped as I whipped around and backed up as far as I could. What does this ginger kid _want_ from me!?

The kid laughed nervously as he rubbed his neck. Ah yes classic. And weapon in three… two…

"Nice to see you're not totally incapable of sound."

Why yes, thank you. Now kindly turn a 180 degree turn and step the fuck away from me.

"Anyway, want to come eat with us?"

I think I hinted pretty clearly that I wanted to be alone and eat my rat shit in peace.

I instead let out a small nod. Why. Why do you make these poor decisions Kai. Don't want to be around people, well too bad, you're a pussy. Don't want to go outside, well too bad, you have to get your daily dose of oxygen. What about a pet. Oh you don't want a rabbit? Then why did you freaking drag you're mother to the rabbit section in a pet store and poke at the glass like you were going to punch your fist through and grab it?

I finally realized what I have done and was about to shake my head vigorously until I saw his smile. His dumb smile. I had never made a person smile before. I must have a gift. I must be God.

I accepted the fact that I was just a mini Rob Schneider and sighed as I grabbed the lunch tray of decomposing meat and followed the kid to his table, instantly sending a glare fatass's way. He shot me a glare in return, and I sent him an 'asshole' hand signal. He stared at me confused, but just ignored me and turned back to his drinking buddies.

I never knew those would come in handy.

"Guys, this is Kai." The ginger kid said.

"Yeah, we know, we were all in class." The raven haired said.

"Except for Kenny." Fatass snickered, receiving a punch from a kid in an orange parka in return. I'm assuming that's Kenny.

"Well, I'm Kyle." The ginger said as he held out a hand for me to shake.

Kyle. The boy has a name. Oh what joy I never had before.

I hesitantly shook his hand, and looked at the other guys to introduce themselves. They just went back to eating the dead bodies of a cow though.

How dare they. I am precious and they will acknowledge that.

"Ahem!" Kyle coughed, glaring at the two who are yet to be named.

"Oh, sorry, I'm Stanley, but you can call me Stan." Raven hair introduced. "The fatass over there is Eric, but we call him Cartman, fatass, Nazi, racist, whatever floats your boat."

"Hey!" Eric exclaimed. I'm just going to call him Cartman. It seems more catchy.

"And this lovely porn lover over here is Kenneth 'Kenny' McCormick." Stan said, pointing to Kenny. "He doesn't talk a lot, so I'm sure you two will get along fine."

"Hmph." Kenny said.

"What."

"He said hi." Stan said. "No one really understands him at first, but you'll get used to it.

I sighed as I set my tray down, staring longingly at the kid across the room who flipped me off earlier. We are the same. That's pretty uncommon for me.

I managed to catch some of the conversation, but all I could notice was Kenny examining me like I was some sort of museum artifact. I sat there like an idiot, not knowing what to make of this, until he winked at me. That little bastard **_winked _**at me. Luckily for me, the recess bell rang, so I instantly got up and threw my lunch (tray and all) into the trash can and bulleted out the door.

Nope. Nope. This town is not going to change me. I will survive, even if this town goes through hell and back.


End file.
